Archive for May, 2005

essence of life

Tuesday, May 31st, 2005

i remember master yoda had a conversation with anakin. anakin came to him after he dreamed of his wife death. master yoda said, as i quoted, you have
to be free from things you care about. i dont remember well. but i got the impression that in his oppinion, the things we care much are only a burden
in search of peaceful mind. correct me if i am wrong.

i keep rewinding and thinking about this dialogue. what does master yoda mean by that?
maybe he was saying, let loose.

do we or do we not have the power to control our running life?
is it necesarry to live like there is no tomorrow, thus precious every moment?
what is the essence of living? getting everything we want or preparing for life after death? ( if you believe in it )
if thats too much, how about just living in a peaceful mind? i am addicted to it. i search and explore. and i am not finished yet. and seems to me,
everytime i loosen up on 1 thing, im doing one step forward. i found that with just being councious, think clear, every path is opened.

freemind

Tuesday, May 31st, 2005

do you realize that u have the most beautiful look?

would you be able to see what is beneath and ignore the surface?

would you be able to see that what you have is more than enough, and in fact you have it all.

do you realize that you have the most beautiful look?

ordinary people is what we are. we missbehaved and made mistakes. we didnt know which way to go. maybe we just have to take it slow. -john legend-

things that already there, they’re there. its just on how we look at it. same path, same result.

some say that happiness will come along. some say it needs to be found. some say it doesnt exist. i say, you can not fake it.

would peaceful mind leads to happiness? do you realize that YOU HAVE the most beautiful soul?

put aside the I CAN NOT and I AM NOT thoughts. get in the freeway. so you might crashed, but you have lived to it.

be a stubborn this time. realize that you, are….beautiful.

ada yang mau baca?

Monday, May 9th, 2005

Courage, to take a risk, to leave the things we always do and start on new and undiscovered world out there, because the truth is out there.

this quote was said to me by a friend. And whats written below is somewhat we have talked that time.

kita hidup menurut akal dan budi. Tapi most of all, the way we brought up in a specific neighbourhood, effects all. Kita cenderung bertingkah laku sesuai dengan apa yang baik menurut orang, karena jika tidak sesuai dengan standar, biasanya sih dianggap aneh dan gak nurut orang tua.

Contohnya, dlm lingkungan hidup kedokteran. Siapa sih orang tua yg profesinya dokter yg gak mau anaknya mengikuti jejak karirnya? Banyak teman2 yang ternyata selidik punya selidik mengalami hal ini. Maybe around two third of the community. Tapi entah hanya karena dorongan orang tua, atau dorongan nurani diri mereka sendiri, mereka survive sampai saat ini menjalani kehidupan bakal dokter.

Dari sini, akan lahir 2 generasi dokter.

Dokter yang baik dan dokter yang pandai. Which one would you choose to be? I would choose to be the combination of both! Hehehe…curang ya? Pilihannya

kan

cuma 2 padahal. Tapi sebenernya bisa kombinasi kok. Dokter yang baik, otomatis akan pandai. Karena niatnya yang super super lurus, membuat dia belajar banyak untuk membantu orang. Not just to cure, but to concern about the patients abbility to finance their health. Meaning, dia akan mencari tahu seluk beluk kedokteran yang paling memungkinkan untuk menyembuhkan pasien. Not just through the very latest method, malah mungkin metode konservatif, karena seringkali inilah yang dibutuhkan sebenarnya. And to cure patients, will make them very glad.

Dokter yang pintar, secara umum menurut penglihatan, akan tidak peduli urusan tetek bengek pasien. All he knows, this is the way to do the curing, if the patient refuse to follow under some conditions etc. financial, it is their own problemo. Loh, terdengar seperti judging ya? Tapi memang kenyataannya begitu kok. Bahkan saya pun pernah mengalaminya. And that experience, membuat saya berprinsip I will trully be a good doctor, to have empathy but not sympathy. We are dealing with humans here, not goods. And don’t treat people they way we don’t want to be treated.

The way to be a good doctor,dokter yang baik, is not always smooth. Dan dunia pekerjaan diluar

sana

, including menjadi dokter yang notabene pasti akan mendapat lapangan pekerjaan, gak gampang. Sejak dari bangku kuliah seleksi alam itu mulai kejadian. Sifat natural orang-orang mulai terlihat.

Ada

yang memang belajar karena dia mau, ada yg belajar karena gila nilai, dan ada yg belajar karena memang that’s just the way it should be. Saya, terus terang, masuk kategori ke-3. mau jadi dokter? Ya harus belajar. Walaupun eneg, fed-up, bertumpuk-tumpuk diktat dan handbook yang rasanya gak pernah abis dibaca, bahkan muak….dalam tahap ini, semua seperti kaset rekaman yang diputar ulang untuk  4 tahun kalau lancar dan bisa lebih kalau tersendat-sendat seperti saya hehe…

Setelah rekaman kaset habis, mulai masuk tahap pertengahan dunia pekerjaan. Masuk ko-asistensi. Disini belajar how to deal with the real things. Real human, and not manequin. Kalau dulu filosofi kebanyakkan mahasiswa kedokteran itu adalah to be a good doctor = lulus Sked dengan nilai cum laude. Sekarang juga masih sih, ada yang belajar karena ingin lulus lantaran gak mau HER atau stan-ko di bagian yang sama atau ada yang benar-benar mempelajari hal-hal esensial yang wajib dimengerti ( red, bukan menghapal untuk ujian ) waktu dia stase di bagian itu. Ada kasusnya juga, salah satu teman yg ketahuan ngumpetin bahan ‘bocoran’ ujian dari residen, alias atasannya ko-ass2, dari temen2 sekelompoknya…demi nilai. God, dia, ga akan  survive di dunia  luar nanti.

Kalau tahap ini beres2 aja, siap sih sebenernya mau jadi dokter…iya gak ya? Gak juga deh……

Disamping hal-hal akademis, untuk menjadi orang sukses dan survive butuh pecutan-pecutan. Hal-hal diluar akademis yang justru membangun karakter dan kemampuan untuk beradaptasi, networking, and to know the real deal.

Berorganisasi dan mencoba hal-hal baru untuk ‘doctor wanna be’ itu masih tabu, even to me. All I knew, ya melewati tahap2 diatas itu=siap jadi dokter. I don’t have the courage and willing to broaden up my point of living, which is a very small world to live in actually. But I do know that its not enough just to know everything when we don’t socialize. Pengalaman bekerja dengan orang lain amat sangat membantu to have a social life sebenernya, seperti berorganisasi itu. Dan dari situ kita tahu, bahwa dunia ini gak hanya seluas daun kelor. Dunia kedokteran gak hanya berujung pada treat ill patients. We could be something bigger than that. Don’t feel like God just because u can cure people. We’re not Him, we’re just His tools to do the working. If u feel like you’ve achieved all, take a good look of yourself again. The courage to change from what uve been living in, and to keep growing, is better.

Oh ya, ada satu quote lagi. Orang akan menilai suatu kebenaran jika hal itu banyak dianut, dan kesalahan = minoritas. Padahal kebenaran itu seringkali ditemukan di tempat-tempat yg jarang ‘dilewati’. Jadi jangan hanya melihat hal-hal besar aja, lihat juga hal-hal kecil J